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Posted on Wednesday, 19 July 2023 Source flanaganfilm Via king-shit-thembo

flanaganfilm:

Absolutely.

Hollywood really is a place like no other. If you grow up loving cinema, certain people can take on mythic status in your imagination. Actors, filmmakers; they are larger than life. They become idols in the truest sense - an image that is actually worshipped.

But Hollywood is actually full of very weird human beings who have been lucky enough to make their living in a world of make-believe. A huge percentage of the people who work in this industry are strange birds, unsuited for working anywhere else.

Some of our biggest stars wouldn’t last ten minutes working a real job; some of our most exalted filmmakers collapse inward if they’re in a crowded room. They can have unusual talents, or beauty, or unique perspectives and abilities that have propelled them to various levels of success, or even stardom, but they’re just normal, neurotic people.

And success, fame, and money can really twist people. It can be like radiation. They can go full Gollum from it.

But most people who work in Hollywood are not stars at all. The vast majority of people who work here are not rich, not famous. Most are hardworking craftsmen and craftswomen who are fighting every day to make a living, scraping by the best they can in an industry that is brutal, impersonal, and impenetrable.

But every single person in this business - whether they are superstars or not - are just ordinary people. They’re insecure, anxious, and prone to all of the failings we mortals are prone to. Some of them are awesome; some of them are assholes. But most of the people here (even the superstars) quietly feel like they don’t belong, or that they don’t deserve it, or that their sheer ordinariness will be discovered any minute.

In fact, it’s the people who seem to feel the opposite - those rare people who feel that they DO belong here, and deserve the lifestyle this industry can afford, who are inevitably the least likable ones I’ve met.

As I’ve been lucky enough to keep working in this business, I’ve met a lot of the people who I idolized along the way. Filmmakers and actors who I admire so much, whose work has shaped the trajectory of my life without them knowing it. I’ve been starstruck every time, and I am still am - I stammer, I freeze, and I kick myself for what I say, or don’t say, or how I said it. I’m not good at it. I have acute social anxiety, and when you throw me at someone I admire, I turn into a blubbering idiot.

They say “don’t meet your heroes” because you may (likely will) be disappointed by just how ordinary they truly are. Or worse, they may even turn out to be people you wouldn’t want to interact with in normal circumstances - your heroes might be people you wouldn’t want to invite to coffee. The persona you have admired is a product in itself, something you bought, something you have taken home and displayed proudly in your imagination… but the human being behind that persona is full of all the ordinary failings. That can be really hard to reconcile.

So yeah, a long-winded way of saying that I’ve had the experience of meeting people I admired a great deal only to be disappointed, or worse. I’ve got some nightmare stories in there where the actual person violently shattered the idol I’d built in my imagination. I won’t share those stories, there’s little point in that, but instead I’ll talk about the rare exceptions - the few heroes I’ve met who were every bit as awesome as I’d hoped they’d be.

They may say “never meet your heroes,” but they haven’t met Mark Hamill.

I worked with Mark on The Fall of the House of Usher, and he is one of my favorite people. Kind, generous, humble, and so, so funny. I was nervous and excited to meet Mark for the obvious reasons, because of the hero he was in my imagination - but I got to meet Mark the actor, the father, the husband, the humanitarian, and the friend.

Guillermo Del Toro - one of my biggest heroes, his work has meant so much to me. And I was terrified to meet him. But he is one of the most joyful, honest, sweet-natured people I’ve met in the business, and his love for movies is infectious. For me, the man himself exceeded the myth.

I’ve been lucky to meet other exceptions to this rule, heroes of mine who exceeded my expectations - Ewan McGregor, Mick Garris, Brian Henson, Heather Langenkamp, Henry Thomas - and yeah, I’ve had the other experience too. But I try to focus on the exceptions.

It can be unhealthy to idolize people - unhealthy for you, and unhealthy for them. But it’s truly awesome when someone is even more amazing than you imagined.